The Strike, the Occupants and I

What’s happening people?! That was a stupid question wasn’t it? E pele. Eku Fuel subsidy protest and strike. I'm so sorry I've been off for a while. I heard so many people are broke right now. It is well. Nigeria will survive. Nigerians will survive.

I am not in the mood to start a controversy on the Fuel Subsidy issue. I am tired of these words… democracy, cabalocracy, fuel, subsidy, strike, oil, President,… and then Goodluck Ebele Jonathan. I have tweeted and tweeted about the controversial topic of The Removal of Fuel Subsidy and even my fingers now know how to type #occupyNigeria itself without my help.

This compulsory holiday has caused so many things- the good, the bad and the ugly.

Many wives are glad their workaholic husbands have been forced to stay at home. For the men, the story is a bit twisted because they have had to spend more money by staying at home. Whining babies running around, neighbours coming around to while away time because they are also bored out of their minds and you just can’t help but buy ‘miniras’ now. Some licks and chops must follow. But the good part, like a friend said, is when he gets to play with his kids more and have more quiet times with his wife and gets to have sex anytime he wants it. But then, that also has a bad part. Hmmn…The part where your wife tells you she’s pregnant after 5 kids. You’ll just want to die. Wont you?

For the bachelors, the always happy people. I have a good example of that as a tenant in our house. He has since the strike, had just one girl around. Funny enough the girl thinks because she has stayed for over a week in his apartment she should be ‘the one’. Eeyah… little does she know that on Saturday/Sunday when she went home to repack for this week, another girl was around. The girl is back here again feeling so cool. Chai! Niaja players sha. Who will tell the girl? Me?! She’ll get to know when Ahmed doesn’t call her after the strike. Right now, he needs cheap sex and a woman that can manage his money during this stay-at-home period.

For the Ladies, well those that decide not to be as stupid as the lady above are occupying their own beds or their serious boyfriend’s bed… come to think of it, those occupying their boyfriend’s bed could be as stupid as the lady above, if the boyfriend is actually not a boyfriend. A lady I know as since the strike not been in her father’s house. If you ask her she’ll say ‘I’m occupying my boyfriend’s house’. I just wonder, does that actually sound right? Occupying your husband’s or fiancé’s house would have been a better idea, Jeez!

How have I been spending my own holiday? I have been occupying my own bed. Twisting on turning in the sheets till 10:00am is not a bad thing at all. I’ve gained about 1.5kg since December, so I’m now officially 54.5kg. Yay! Now, my doctor can stop worrying *Waving at you Dr Beejay*.
I’ve been trying my hands on new stuff. Been making some beaded bags. They are lovely. I’ve been thinking of a Valentine’s Special. Small red clutch bags! So guys can give their lovers something different and not just the cakes and chocolates. Ladies what do you think? Cool hmn? Don’t worry guys it won’t eat deep into your pockets.
Oh yes! And I met a new friend too, a guy actually. No… no… no… It’s not what you’re thinking o and lailai I’m not telling you anything *Waving at you ____*
So this strike isn’t so bad after all… for me sha o.

On another thought, who knows GEJ very well? Abeg give him this message for me. Tell him that this is Democracy not Dictatocracy. If he wants to be a King, he should go to his village and become one. He better stop this stronghead he is doing. He must not forget that Nigerians have one thing in common... ‘IJOGBON’. No be only him get crase o. If 160 billion Nigerians start their own, he will not only lose his shoes. Who knows? Maybe it is even this strong head that made his father not buy him shoes. *shrugs*


#OccupyNigeria #SayNoToCabalocracy #SayNoToKleptocracy