In what looked like an attempt to highlight the issue of female circumcision in Africa and other parts of the world, Linda Ikeji, an ex-model turned author posed a question to her readers: How do you enjoy sex if you are circumcised?
Here's what she blogged.
So here goes. I haven't been with a man in so long, that I hardly remember what it feels like anymore. Mostly for two reasons. One, I was brought up in a kind of way. I have to really really be into someone before I can share my body with them, and I haven't met anyone special in a long while, so I've been riding solo. It makes me very sad sometimes...
Secondly, I've never really enjoyed sex. And I blame it on the fact that I was circumcised. Some things were cut off, so there's not much sensation down there. I mean, I enjoyed intimacy and when the tonque was at work...*cough*... but penetration was a different case. Half the time, I couldn't wait for him to get off me. (I can't believe I'm writing all these on the internet...hmmm...let's continue sha). So usually, I tell myself why seek something you don't particularly enjoy? What's the point really? So I've basically just stayed away.
But lately I have been feeling somehow and I think it's time to get my groove back. I want to feel like a woman again, so I've decided to find me a man before the end of the year. But I don't want to be turned off sex again. As a circumcised woman, how can I make myself enjoy sex? Does circumcision even have anything to do with it? That's always been my belief because other circumcised women I've spoken with say they don't enjoy sex either...at least not as much as women who were not circumcised.
Do you have any advice for me and other women in my situation? Please I don't want any yéyé responses o. This is a serious matter..:-)
She is known to be one of the most controversial bloggers in Nigeria but I am sure no one will have expected what she revealed.
Wow. Linda is this fine and she is single? MEN!!!! Please show this lady some love. Make her feel like a Woman. *Sobs*
wow what a surprise...some one like linda is havg issues like dis...well ma advice to her is she should get'mr right' i mean someone dat loves her...bcos making luv with someone dat really luvs is something u live to remember......
ReplyDeleteAhan!*sobs*....? You aint gonna help her with that. I do feel her pain here,this wasn't an easy decision for her to make o...I mean ,making it known to people. All I know is that the Almighty God will see her through & with Olori's comment,everything will be alright.
ReplyDeleteU are not supposed to like sex until u are married or else it will be a show of shame we find all over the place.No Lady will be involved with that-self control is so laking in the youth today for overdoes of sexuality in the air-Devil business to destroy souls.
ReplyDeleteIn marriage u owe to ur husband ur body n if u love Him satisfying him sexually will make u Love sex. When ur husband knows this issue of circumcision(African Barbarism) He will help u to build from somewhere by not being so hard on U.U will learn from foreplay.Read books.Bible tells us we know by BOOKs.Most Africans don't read but live in the past inside information age.
Wait until u get to that bridge But Choose the Love of your life.That would not be a problem as u think.Ur thinking only is making it so.There are many women that are like u but enjoying their marriage and sex life.For now its no more the practice dont live in the past.Think Positive that's all u need.God's Love & Care
Dear Linda, i must say that i am speechlessly stunned by your diary on this topic but like they say: a problem shared is half solved. I have encountered this before and the girl in question always enjoyed multiple orgasms. This is how it goes. You need two things - a man who does not necessarily ride a woman like a horse for hours before he climaxes but one that can actually accelerate his ejaculation. Secondly, the same guy must have feelings strong enough to understand that penetration for you comes with pain except on some rare occasions. When u find 'him,' your problem is half solved. As a result of the peculiarity involved here, he has to start any love-making episode with loads of fore-play. If he's good at it, that and tactical stimulation of your sensitive spots would have you climax after some time. On your part, there's a need to learn a certain breath-holding technique. According to the girl i mentioned earlier, she learnt to hold her breath in a certain way and at gaps such that it made the whole fore-play even more intense for her. After quite a number of trials, she began to climax (for real 0) and would reach orgasm as many as four (even five) times and would hardly be able to watch movies or chat (as she normally would) afterwards. I'm sure u've forgotten about the guy. Shame on you. U also have to let him into you after your first orgasm when you would be 'wet' enough to accommodate 'him.' It would also be better for you if he's not one of the ones with a 'Benin Yam' between his legs. A moderately sized manhood should suffice but then how would you tell what his size is. I guess you'll have to ask God to favour you in this area. Hope this helps. *wink*
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